I puked a lego.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
