Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
