Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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