So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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