is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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