He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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