bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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