i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
