I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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