why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Randomize
