i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I look better un-naked...
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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