This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
