I'm jealous of your bromance
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
