you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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