So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
