let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
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