I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
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