I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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