I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
