my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize