sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
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Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
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I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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