and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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