4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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