I just cut my nipple shaving
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
