id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
