ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
it hurts more in the daytime
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize