shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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