ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
