The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
