There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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