you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
