It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
