If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize