I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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