like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Randomize
