I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
