when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
