Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize