For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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