So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
