Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
This can only be settled by a dance off.