His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
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I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
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You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.