i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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