I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
