windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
We have started to decorate penises.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
