In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Do vagina's smell?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
