I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
