Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
