I showed him my bush... on skype.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize