Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
