you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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