Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
