I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
