it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
