so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
